Chapter 40: It’s All Good?
It is time once again to Stew on this! I am just reminding you (and me) that there is always more than one way to look at things.
In my last chapter, I advocated that we focus more on what is right about ourselves than on what seems to be wrong. For me, one thing that makes this intention extra challenging is a tendency to focus more on what is wrong “out there.”
That is so easy to do. Things in my country and the world seem completely off kilter, extremely difficult to be okay with, and impossible to understand. We are bombarded with horrible news, in graphic detail, every single day. It all feels so wrong.
During Covid, I found myself caught up in a constant question of, “What must I do to make things right?” I still delve into that kind of thinking occasionally. It is understandable, but it almost always ends up with me feeling frustrated, overwhelmed, hopeless, and in despair.
Ironically, if I am to have any positive impact on things, those states of consciousness do not serve me in the least. Indeed, they render me incapable of doing just about anything other than complaining, lashing out, or shutting down.
So, instead of merely focusing on making things right, my intention is to see things more rightly.
I am not using rightly as opposed to wrongly. I mean more rightly as in more skillfully, more heartfully - more in a way that is congruent with my values and principles. Seeing things more rightly, based on MY values and principles, means looking more for the good, the love, the courage, and the hope.
Seeing things more rightly means seeing them with the eyes of my heart, and that allows me to stay resilient, loving, grounded and effective.
Seeing things more rightly involves judging less by appearances. This can require us to use our imagination, but that is okay because we all have one. And we are always using it! But how are we using it?
When we look out at the world, are we using our imagination to create nightmare scenarios and outcomes? Or are we using it to see things as we would prefer them to be? I have most certainly done both, and they feel very, very different.
I am not suggesting we put our heads in the sand and ignore the very real problems out there. I am not saying we should ignore the very real pain we feel about all the very real suffering in the world.
I am just reminding you (and me) that there is always more than one way to look at things.
One way is to see things more rightly and look for the good. This is admittedly difficult with the truly horrible things that happen, so, perhaps we can start applying this intention with the less horrible, day-to-day difficult stuff.
You know what? We can absolutely look for the good in more of our moments because we are generally guessing about whether something is good or bad anyway. Have you ever thought something was the best thing ever and it turned out otherwise? Have you ever experienced schmootz that turned out to be fertilizer for something fantastic?
I cannot possibly count the number of times I have judged something to be either good or bad, or have worried about something happening in the future, and have been dead wrong. How about you?
As Mark Twain said: “I’ve lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.”
You nor I ever really know what things mean. We have no idea what the future holds. But when we practice seeing more of what is good, acceptable and perfect, we can hold a vision of the world as it could be instead of how it seems to be.
For me, it is far easier to do that that when I limit my watching of the news, but that, of course, is up to you.
Seeing things rightly in this way is not just some Stew-on-This-California-hippie BS. It is not just Pollyanna or “it’s all good, man.” When we see more rightly and acknowledge the good, we are helping to create that kind of world in the future. In fact, since we are literally bringing those values and principles into the world in that moment, we are living more in that kind of world right now!
Of course, we might choose to take actual, physical action for change in the world, and it is sorely needed. When we keep at least one toe in a vision of what is good, beautiful and true, we are more centered, hopeful, effective, wise, and open to creative opportunities. Then, when we choose to speak our truth or take action, we will be able to do so from a deep, whole and true place within.
Our words and actions will not only be more effective; they can also inspire others to find that same place within themselves.
When we see things more rightly, we are not merely trying to convince or brainwash ourselves of something that isn’t true. If you are like me, you know in your heart that the truth IS love, compassion, connection, cooperation, joy, balance, harmony, peace, and a world that could work for everyone.
When we get too caught up in making things right, we lose touch with all those beautiful, eternal truths.
In Cervantes’ Don Quixote, the hero says: “Too much sanity may be madness, and the maddest of all, to see life as it is and not as it should be.”
As you likely know, I am not a fan of the word should, so, I prefer: “…maddest of all is to see life as it is and not as it could be.”
Facts and appearances change. Truth is eternal. Let us not let the appearances of things keep us from our truth.
Stew on that, and I will see you next time.
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